I have ranted previously about people not being able to read attentively when they're trying to solve problems. Here's another one:

A few years ago I helped teach a class on information systems, namely I was in charge of the fun part - a project where students had to write their own web application.

Because lack of documentation was always the part that bugged me most about projects when I was a student myself I spent a great amount of time writing the project material and how-to guides for the software we were using. After the class I mirrored the material on my own website. (Yes, I'm proud of the project being a success.)

Now, for some reason one of the how-tos shows up quite high if you search Google for words like "postgres fuzzy string matching". At one point it tells students:

[...] if you want to use these functions in your database please send a quick e-mail to Martin so we can activate it for your databases.

And they do! Today is the second time I got an e-mail from some random person (this time a student, last time a post-graduate!) asking me to please enable fuzzy string matching in their database. It looks something like this:

Dear Mr Martin Rubli,
I want to use fuzzy string matching in my database. Can you activate it for my database ?.
I hope to hear from you soon. Thank you.

There are several things that strike me here. The first one is that it should be pretty clear from both the URL and some of the text that this is class material, not some generic tutorial. Then, why do those people think I'm running a charitable Postgres fuzzy string matching activation service instead of just posting the simple instructions on my website? And finally, let's assume I had such a magic service, am I supposed to guess the server addresses and the access data?

I think the message is clear here: If you want me to enable fuzzy string matching in your Postgres database, for god's sake include some IP addresses and credentials, so that I can have some fun with them! :-)

Creating a community website is not only quite satisfying because you get to see how customers actually use your products, sometimes it's also quite funny. A few weeks ago Logitech launched the QuickCam Team website which targets developers and users of webcams on alternative platforms and just by looking at it it should be pretty obvious that we don't do product support. (And if it's not obvious enough there's a big fat note on the contact page.) Nevertheless, some people try their luck by reporting random, completely unrelated issues that are poorly phrased and impossible to understand. Here's a funny example:

Subject: Logitech QuickCam 4000

Can you please give me detailed instructions on how to make it impossible for anyone to change my password or otherwise get around it? This is urgent. Thank you.

Somewhat confused by the subject I assumed that the person was referring to her newly created account for the QuickCam Team forums:

I neither understand the subject of your e-mail nor the idea behind your request. What are you trying to achieve? What do you mean by "get around it"?

And once again, the response was no less confusing than the original e-mail:

I created a password for access to the camera images. Now the password box will not recognize my password.
This problem is preventing me from shutting down the computer. I cannot close the image studio, nor shut down the computer.
How can I permanently erase the password?

Part of me wants to help a confused user but a much bigger part of me wants to actually see the live stream from her webcam showing her sitting in front of her computer that apparently doesn't shut down because she forgot the password to a long obsolete piece of software. Not because I like seeing desperate users or because I hate technically challenged people, but because people need to learn to read. If your butcher has a sign outside that says "I don't bake bread" you don't go inside and ask for croissants. Using a computer is not like watching TV. It needs many skills, and reading is the most important one.